In preparation for married life, Chase and I have chosen to participate in pre-marital counselling. We are already learning some things about one another that we were surprised we didn’t already know:)
Along with our counselling sessions, there has been a good amount of reading and workbook homework. (HOMEWORK?? Thought we were done with school???) But it has been a good thing for both of us, and a tangible example, that the marriage relationship doesn’t come easy. It takes time, effort, compromise, encouragement, communication, humility, and above all, LOVE.
It has been a very good experience so far, and I pray that God continues to use it as a guide in our relationship now and for MANY MANY years to come, as we learn how to love each other in new and different ways, remembering that Christ first loved us, and it is ONLY by his amazing grace that we can love Him and others.
One thing that has been a theme throughout our counselling so far, is the fact that neither one of us should be each other’s 1st love. Our first love should ALWAYS be Christ. When Chase and I point one another to Christ, and keep our focus on the Cross first and foremost, we will be loving one another in greater and deeper ways. God desires to use our marriage to advance His kingdom, and bring Him Ultimate glory!!
We aren’t even halfway through our sessions yet, and we would already agree that pre-marital counselling is a great tool to prepare our young, sinful hearts for marriage. So if you are engaged, dating or desire to be married one day, I would strongly encourage you to take the time, and invest a little thought and love into your (future) marriage, by participating in some sort of pre-marital counselling.
Even for you love birds who are already married, and have gone through these books or something similar, I would challenge you, to first open your Bible and devote some quality time with your Lord, and then dig those “marriage” books back out from the attic or from under the bed, and re-evaluate where your relationship with your spouse is. You NEVER know how a few minutes of meditation and reminiscing from your past, could help strengthen your marriage today!
” We love- because he first loved us”
~1 John 4:19
Rogandnell says
That’s awesome Lindsey! My hubby and I did that same one before we got married 🙂 Another great one is Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs. We went through the Love and Respect book a couple years after being married and wish we would’ve the first year. Praying for you guys as you prepare for a life long commitment! It’s amazing 🙂
Jenny says
Lindsey, I love this. Consider this as well: continuing counseling thru the first year of marriage. It’s so EASY during premarital counseling to think “of course!!! that’s what I’ll do/he’ll do/we’ll do/etc, we’re ready to brave those storms, do the hard work…” and then the rubber hits the road and it’s NOTHING like you thought it would be!!! It’s way better and way tougher than you EVER thought! We did counseling for our first year and wowza, was that a life-saver. 🙂 Just a thought. Loving seeing your joy and excitement as you prepare to be Chase’s bride. 🙂
Lindseyjoy says
That is GREAT advice Jenny! I/we have NO CLUE how much harder “happily ever after” will prove to be, from what it sounds like right now!!! Especially when the God promises us that Satan despises marriage and will try ANY WAY possible to tear us down!Thank you for your encouragement and care!